What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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