every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
