when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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