my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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