I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
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