Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
