I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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