i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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