Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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