I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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