so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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