i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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