I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
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