dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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