yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
