I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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