so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
