I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...