I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Is it penis luge time yet?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
