david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
