I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
