i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
