she was so not down for the gang bang
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
