I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Randomize