he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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