Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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