i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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