That's when you crack a 10am beer
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
