Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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