i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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