whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
