He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
