Dual....:-)
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
This is the high leading the old right now
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
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