addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
So many bounce houses so little time
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
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