what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Holy sore nipples Batman
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
