ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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