she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
