So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
