Nicole vs. Life
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize