At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
