Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Dating After Heartbreak
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.