i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
