I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
