awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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