So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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