found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
