i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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