I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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