I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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