You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
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There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize