she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
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Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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